Ghosting. The New Norm.
Norms change with time and as generations pass. It used to be okay to set up your twelve year old daughter with some old man who owned land as an investment. We allude to tolerance in this new age, but I believe that's a mockery. I'm calling it out. I think we're starting to slide backwards. If those who still have the class and the courage to say things that need to be said will just do it, maybe too much absurdity can be avoided. Being a good example these days is shining like a diamond in a dark cavern. Tolerance and diplomatic behavior is not exercised by ignoring people and situations.
There's this new thing. It's called ghosting. Ghosting is the act of ignoring and forgetting a person. Ghosting is leaving things unsaid and unanswered. It's not just the millennial who is doing it, either. It's large companies in response to candidates for employment. It's the dating world of all ages. It's a response to everyday situations since the onslaught of a gender war that's been blown out of proportion. People have decided the best way to deal with things is to pretend they don't exist. I see breaking up this way as something amateurish and juvenile, but I understand why they're doing it. I've met as many people as I can count on one hand in over ten years who know how to properly interact with other human beings. The most disturbing way people are ghosting, however, is in the job market. I think this one is a doozey.
For anyone who doesn't have to worry about that sort of thing anymore, you may be surprised to find out things just don't work the same way they did decades ago in the job market. There are more people looking for work than companies looking for employees. Employers and businesses have become so egotistical in their search for applicants that they don't have to give anyone any idea whether or not they've been considered. They are ghosting their applicants the same way a 22 year old ghosts a former date when she doesn't want to deal with real interaction. This is completely unprofessional. But it's come to pass, because employment is a real a problem now. So many people need jobs and aren't making enough money to survive that employers have their candy shop pick of what and who they want. They no longer have to be an equal partner in the art of business. This is as common as brushing your teeth before bed.
I can see a lot of bad repercussions from ghosting on the way. If someone is trying everything they can to accomplish something or to make contact, the refusal to give them closure is going to turn into a time bomb. It's rude, and it's weak. And people can only take silence for so long. While businesses are busy, they should at least be professional enough to organize their response team correctly. One day, it will come to pass that those who have been ghosted will stop being so accepting of it. This could result in very unhealthy attempts to get attention. In addition, a lot of young people looking for jobs now have almost given up and are dealing in shadier ventures. I just spent five years in NYC surrounded by & living with millennials. It was an eye opening experience, and I do understand where they're coming from. They've been dealt a very bad hand. Just like every other generation who comes of age. It's not a new thing, and those of us who are older should get a grip and start making an effort to understand their plight. Brushing younger generations off and complaining about how things have changed is not a constructive way to make things better for anyone.
Ghosting is passive aggressive. It's cowardly. Ignoring tough situations and becoming too worried to disagree or tell someone what you need is not going to work. Not on any level. The world isn't a rosy, pristine place, and nothing is ever going to be fair. You have to speak up. Blowing political correction out of proportion and failing to say things that need to be said is only going to distance us even more from each other and anything that could have been good. On the other side, mouthing off like a jerk doesn't solve anything, either. I wish we could take just one step back to being brave enough and classy enough to communicate with authenticity. I believe a good first step to this would be for all us old coots to start being better examples in the public eye instead of showing our disgust so much. And that takes some work- these younger ones are downright afraid to look us in the eye and have a real conversation over a cup of coffee. Seriously. I suffered this almost every day while living in New York. It was almost unbearable. So please come on.. let's make some noise again. And this time, let's be a little more mature about it.
There's this new thing. It's called ghosting. Ghosting is the act of ignoring and forgetting a person. Ghosting is leaving things unsaid and unanswered. It's not just the millennial who is doing it, either. It's large companies in response to candidates for employment. It's the dating world of all ages. It's a response to everyday situations since the onslaught of a gender war that's been blown out of proportion. People have decided the best way to deal with things is to pretend they don't exist. I see breaking up this way as something amateurish and juvenile, but I understand why they're doing it. I've met as many people as I can count on one hand in over ten years who know how to properly interact with other human beings. The most disturbing way people are ghosting, however, is in the job market. I think this one is a doozey.
For anyone who doesn't have to worry about that sort of thing anymore, you may be surprised to find out things just don't work the same way they did decades ago in the job market. There are more people looking for work than companies looking for employees. Employers and businesses have become so egotistical in their search for applicants that they don't have to give anyone any idea whether or not they've been considered. They are ghosting their applicants the same way a 22 year old ghosts a former date when she doesn't want to deal with real interaction. This is completely unprofessional. But it's come to pass, because employment is a real a problem now. So many people need jobs and aren't making enough money to survive that employers have their candy shop pick of what and who they want. They no longer have to be an equal partner in the art of business. This is as common as brushing your teeth before bed.
I can see a lot of bad repercussions from ghosting on the way. If someone is trying everything they can to accomplish something or to make contact, the refusal to give them closure is going to turn into a time bomb. It's rude, and it's weak. And people can only take silence for so long. While businesses are busy, they should at least be professional enough to organize their response team correctly. One day, it will come to pass that those who have been ghosted will stop being so accepting of it. This could result in very unhealthy attempts to get attention. In addition, a lot of young people looking for jobs now have almost given up and are dealing in shadier ventures. I just spent five years in NYC surrounded by & living with millennials. It was an eye opening experience, and I do understand where they're coming from. They've been dealt a very bad hand. Just like every other generation who comes of age. It's not a new thing, and those of us who are older should get a grip and start making an effort to understand their plight. Brushing younger generations off and complaining about how things have changed is not a constructive way to make things better for anyone.
Ghosting is passive aggressive. It's cowardly. Ignoring tough situations and becoming too worried to disagree or tell someone what you need is not going to work. Not on any level. The world isn't a rosy, pristine place, and nothing is ever going to be fair. You have to speak up. Blowing political correction out of proportion and failing to say things that need to be said is only going to distance us even more from each other and anything that could have been good. On the other side, mouthing off like a jerk doesn't solve anything, either. I wish we could take just one step back to being brave enough and classy enough to communicate with authenticity. I believe a good first step to this would be for all us old coots to start being better examples in the public eye instead of showing our disgust so much. And that takes some work- these younger ones are downright afraid to look us in the eye and have a real conversation over a cup of coffee. Seriously. I suffered this almost every day while living in New York. It was almost unbearable. So please come on.. let's make some noise again. And this time, let's be a little more mature about it.
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